2 days ago i said goodbye to my family. 2 days ago my heart broke into a million pieces. the bond i have with my family is indescribable, they are my best friends. they are encouraging, loving, supportive, comforting, trustworthy, funny, creative and so much more. leaving them for the first time ever, wrecked me in more ways than i thought it would, and it’s still hurting. it makes me sad to think i can’t go and hug them when i’m upset right now or when i have a problem making a decision, lay with them and ask them for advice. it hurts me to not be able to facetime them everyday. this is hard real hard and there’s parts of me that makes me question why i ever decided to do this. why did i think leaving the country for 9 months is something i could do? and the reality behind it all is because i can do it, but not alone. and i need to remember why i choose this. why in the moment when i filled out that application did i believe in myself and believe that i could surrender everything. and it’s hard sometimes to remember why when the devil is trying to tell you why not. why you can’t do it? why you aren’t strong enough. i choose to do the race because i want to love others and love them deeply. i want to bring hope to the hopeless. i want to see god move in ways i’ve never seen. i want to grow deeply in my relationship with god. i want to bring joy to the depressed. i want to remind people how beautiful they are, how loved they are, i want to tell people they are more than enough, i want to bring food to the hungry, hug the hurting, comfort the orphans. and when i sit and really think about it and how i’m surrendering all that’s good right now i get excited all over again because i remember why i got called to do this and why i chose to say yes. because better things are coming far greater than everything i surrendered.
Author: General Posts | | by worldrace-blogs
